My boyfriend and I married during our junior year of college, and immediately set about trying to start a family. Within two months I was at the local Planned Parenthood for a pregnancy test. And another odd thing happened. When the counselor gave me the postive test result, the first thing she asked was, "Is this good news, or bad news?"
My hackles went up. If I answered "Bad news," I was sure, she'd probably just pick up the phone and arrange an abortion for me without giving it another thought. I answered that it was good news.. But I didn't have medical insurance. The counselor referred me to a local midwives' clinic, making me the only prolife person I know who didn't have a bad experience at Planned Parenthood.
I arrived at the midwives' clinic, which was in a local hospital. I reported for my appointment and was asked for my medicaid card. When I told them I was an uninsured college student, they told me that this was a clinic for medicaid patients. I begged. I pleaded. They sent me away.
I cried out in the parking lot. "They never flat out TELL you to have an abortion," I sobbed to my husband, "but they make it very clear that they expect you to! They don't offer you so much as a kind word!" I was heartbroken. Nobody cared about our baby. But a woman came running out of the hospital looking for us. Panting, she told us, "I'm glad I caught you before you left!" She introduced herself as one of the midwives. She assured me that she would make sure that I got proper prenatal care, and led us back inside. She took us to the financial office. There, she told a clerk to make payment arrangements for me, then send me back to the clinic. I never forgot the despair as I stood crying in the parking lot, or the relief and gratitude when the midwife reached out to me. I swore that I'd never leave a pregnant woman alone and despairing, as I had been.
Even with payment arrangements, we were nervous about the medical costs. I wondered if perhaps we could get some kind of catastropic insurance. We made an appointment. There, we were humiliated. The case worker counted our student loans as income, but didn't count tuition and books as necessary expenses. We pleaded. We weren't looking for full coverage -- just emergency coverage in case something went wrong. We were told that we should have thought of this before I became pregnant. Back out in the parking lot I was furious. Again, they never outright TELL you to get an abortion, but they sure do make it plain what they expect. I hated the people who hated my baby.
Fortunately, it was only the people being paid to be helpful that were so callous. Family and friends, although sure that we were nuts to have a child we couldn't afford, managed to be excited about the pregnancy. My parents brought by vegetables from the garden. Classmates occasionally bought me lunch. The ladies in the college cafeteria loaded extra meat and cheese onto my sandwiches. Friends invited me to dinner. The midwives referred me to a food bank. And my husband's co-workers in the restraunt saved leftovers for me instead of throwing them away.
My advisor was a huge help. In order to be able to finish school on schedule, I'd have to be creative. With my advisor's help, I arranged to take two required classes by independent study.
Another angel of mercy was my childbirth instructor. We explained our uninsured status, and she referred us to a neonatologist that would discharge our baby from the hospital as soon as she had a clean bill of health instead of keeping her the usual three days. The midwife, likewise, agreed to discharge me as soon as I checked out healthy. The birthing room was reserved for me -- it was cheaper than a labor and delivery suite. And I was reserved a semi-private room, again the least expensive options. The childbirth instructor also hooked us up with an agency that loaned out infant car seats for free.
We were all set to have our baby.
NEXT: Part 5 - Every Little Bit Helps
The Entire Fence Sitter Series:
Laying the Groundwork
Biology of Sex
Curiouser and Curiouser
Under Pressure
Every Little Bit Helps
The Eye Opener
A Learning Odyssey
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